Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Inventory


This morning I rose early and got on my knees by my bed.  I looked out the window at the big tree on my neighbor's property.  I have enjoyed that tree for 18 years and it feels like a friend.  To think that soon I will no longer see it makes me sad.  I remember raking up its leaves in autumn to make a pile for my boys to jump in.  I remember Gentleman Bird flew to that tree when he was first flying.  So many precious memories!  I managed to pray a bit, but mostly these days it is the basic "Lord, please help me."  My mind traveled to the thought of greeting a man from the moving company.  My body filled with anxiety.  Every step is a step toward separating from what I know.  The good thing in all this is that I will not be separated from God.

Mark dropped the boys off at school and then came back home with a pumpkin muffin from Panera Bread.  As we enjoyed a hot beverage and munched on our shared muffin we talked about moving.  Shortly after finishing our muffin the man from the moving company arrived to take inventory.  As he went about his business, Mark and I stood in our little house remembered the day we moved in.  We embraced one another thankful for our good memories.

All of us are having anxiety about the move and it comes out in different ways.  Mark and I have been struggling with attitudes and behavioral issues concerning our sons.  Each of us is looking around and realizing that we may be enjoying something for the last time.  Today we live in our home and the next thing we know we will be in a strange place. In a few weeks we will be boarding a plane to this new place we are going to call home.  We will explore Denver for five days looking for the spot God wants us to settle.  This will be a very important trip for our little family.

"He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world." (1 John 4:4)
And though this world, with devils filled,
Should threaten to undo us,
We will not fear, for God hath willed
His truth to triumph though us.
~Luther 

6 comments:

fairmaiden said...

My heart aches along with you as I read this. I will pray for your trip. I hope it will be a delight to see your new home...like going into a candy store.

Becky said...

Fairmaiden, thank you. I hope our trip will be as you say.

Susan said...

Praying for you - change is hard for me, too, so I can imagine how you feel. Do think, though, of the beautiful scenery awaiting you - new trees, new sunrises, new animals - I know you will appreciate them all, and I hope you'll document them here as well. Praying for you all ...

Becky said...

Thank you Susan, I very much appreciate you and your encouragement. And I will share the wonders of Colorado with everyone.

Sharon said...

Change can be scary, but God is with you and your family and He has opened a door for you and you can depend on Him guiding you to the right home. Trust in Him. You will get to see more of God's beautiful work. We hope to see it too through your blog. :) Praying for you!

Becky said...

Thank you so much Sharon! ((Hug))